A Very Angry Post

My husband, who works for a public school system, is supposed to be paid on the last day of the month. We weren't too worried when the check didn't arrive on Wednesday, June 31st, because, well, we learned to expect things to be a little slow. When the check didn't show up on Thursday, July 1st, we were getting a bit nervous, but still not enough to call the Board of Education. When Friday arrived and the check didn't, Shon called only to find out the Board was closed. We transferred the meager funds from our savings to our checking account and went up to Bowman for the weekend.

Today, on Tuesday, July 6th, Shon called the Board again (no answer), and then the high school. The principle told him the Board was off this whole week and offered to call the superintendent at home. She called back 10 minutes later and said that the superintendent will not do anything until Monday, July 12th.

Since I haven't been able to find a job in the area, Shon's salary is the only income we've got and it hits us hard when the payment is delayed. If not for my parents, who wired us a little money last week, we'd literally be living on bread and water now. Even though we aren't going to starve, however, we will be penalized for not paying our bills on time.

I am not angry about not having money - I'm too used to that by now. I am angry, because the local Board of Education cares that little about people who work for it. How difficult is it to get to the office, find the check that somehow didn't make it to the post office before, and mail it? To me it feels like lack of common decency.

Also, I am angry with my husband, because he refuses to make the situation public knowledge (say, write to the editor of the local newspaper). He is afraid it will hurt him - or us. I, having grown up in a country where nobody ever complained about things like this, know where this silence leads.

Lastly, I am angry at myself, because I called Shon a coward and because I can't back off the way I normally do when we disagree. I really believe that it's not right to keep silent. I won't go against my husband. I won't send a letter to the editor. Instead, I'm just sitting here, typing away my anger, hoping to replace it with something close to peace and ending up with numbness instead.